What my blog is

Hello people,

It's a strange thing with this blog. Up to about 3 months ago I was under the impression that what I wrote on this blog- though intended for whoever wants to hear it- was only really going to a few people. I could have almost counted them on one hand- and when I wrote- I basically had in mind that the people reading it would be my sister, my friend's Fi and Suz, my sister-in-law-to-be Angie (who is also my friend of course :), and a few old friends who I've reacquainted with through their blogs.


But over the last few months i keep finding out that there are actually lots of people who do read by blog, sporadically perhaps- but I've at least moved off counting my fingers to having to count using my toes ;)



Nothing like the huge readership of most of the blogs I read, or even some of my friends, but slightly intimidating none the less.

I always find it funny to read blog posts on blogging. But here is one.

When I first started this blog in 2008, I was a studying first year Bible College student, terribly homesick for Melbourne, who was feeling strange because for the first time in many years she wasn't really doing any formal ministry. Part of the idea of the blog was that maybe this would be the much needed avenue for reflecting on and sharing what I was learning. For some reason it didn't really turn out like that.


Then I started my Kids/Women's ministry job. And I quickly gave up any intention of making this blog a deliberate "ministry". I was too tired, and to be honest whenever I started writing a post that was to instruct or teach, I felt a bit overwhelmed. I didn't feel like an expert enough in anything to write something instructive. I would write such posts, but I would always feel a bit proud and arrogant, and they would remain in my drafts folder. I think that I underestimate myself. I have lots of things I could say that might be helpful- but until that knowledge is reflected in how I feel about it- this blog will remain a reflection of what I've discovered and learnt- not primarily what I want to teach others.

And with a novel thrown in, which I know deserves more attention than its given, my blog takes second place to most things in my life. I blog because i want to- not because i feel like I should. This is somewhat reflected in the occasional months that go past without a post.

So what is this blog?:

This blog is NOT honest. What do I mean? I mean that this blog is not a blog where I write all my true experiences and feelings. There are things in my life that are too private for a non-anonymous blog. I share what I feel comfortable with, and while i sometimes worry that this is a bit of a rose-coloured glance at my life- that's just how it has to be sometimes. And I think I've come to peace with that.

This blog is for friends. That doesn't mean I don't love it when people I don't know read it and comment! I do. But I can't be bothered thinking every time I write it about how to make it good or interesting or relevant for "the public". So apologies if it's not! :)

This blog is mostly for me. I do think about who is reading it, and I occasionally don't say things that I think might be unhelpful. But this blog first and foremost is for me to have time to reflect and record this strange time in my life. The idea of thinking really hard about my blog and how it might help people makes me very tired :) And so I pray that God will take my reflections and use them to help others, even if I don't have time to be deliberate about it.


Thanks to all of you who read it. I'm very thankful to God for you. It's lovely that even though many of you are far away- that I can share a little bit of this adventure with you.
love B